What do i call failure?

Normally, I’d sit here all happy, and jumping for joy that I’ve made it past day 3. That’s not the case – Again. I am starting to get sick and tired of this failing bullshit. And, i know i should “look at the positives”, or “learn from this experience.” I’ve done all that before, and, it’s got me nowhere. It’s hard to see shit positive when i don’t see it. It’s easy to say “learn from your mistakes” – when you’re not the one who’s doing it. I’m sorry, i suffer from depression, along with a whole whack of shit, and when i fail, i hit hard. There’s no easy way to put it.